don't shoal the cars

Lame bicyclist practice number #783

Ahead there is a traffic light.  It's red.  A long line of cars has formed waiting for this light to turn green.  If there is a bike lane, your course is clear.  You line up with the other bicyclists.  If there is no bike lane your course is also clear (really) you line up with cars.

Bicyclists are all about "taking a lane" when it suits them.  When there is no bike lane and they don't want to be too near parked cars with surprising car doors.  However when "taking a lane" means waiting with the rest of the cars for the light to turn green they suddenly find the confidence to ride up on the side, car doors be damned.

Why this is lame.

You shoal the cars (cut off every car that is waiting and move your skinny bike ass in front of whomever was first in line) and then the light turns green and you fiddle with your clip and then slowly start turning the pedals because you came to a stop in high gear.  Meanwhile all the cars (and maybe the more reasonable bicyclists) are waiting for you to get the fuck under way.

Contraption Captain says, gently: You have to wait your turn.  Would you run up to the front of the check-out line in the grocery store?  Didn't you learn this in kindergarten?

What I say less gently.  A good bicyclist doesn't twist the rules to suit their every situation.